You really hate the car, especially when mama can't sit in the back and play with you. So when it is just you and I going somewhere I know it will be very distressing for you. I don't enjoy hearing you cry, it breaks my heart.
Though you love it when we are out as there is so much to see. Today we went to the gardens to see our friends. You loved watching the big kids feeding the ducks. You loved getting cuddles from all the kids as they each asked to hold you.
But of course there comes the time that we have to leave. And though you were happy for a short time on the drive home, you had your "Sophie" and your "rumbly bumbly bear". However I knew you needed to do a poo, and so when you began to cry I knew you must be dirty, as your cry became more and more distressed, of course there was no where safe to pull over.
Finally there was a quiet street to pull over in. And sure enough you had pooed, a pooexplosion all over you and your seat. Your poor little face looking up at me so sad. So after cleaning you up, giving you a fresh nappy and finding some clean clothes for you, you then vomited on them. So again I cleaned you off and found you a clean singlet to wear.
But now you need a feed. So we sit and we cuddle. And as you fall asleep at my breast I think about how grateful I am for these days.
Grateful that we have an airconditioned car to sit in on this hot day. Grateful for friends to spend time with. Thankful for our woven to cover you as the sun beams through the windscreen. Grateful that I have this moment to stop and admire you, to count your fingers, to smell your baby scent, stroke your soft skin and play with your tuft of hair.
I will miss these days
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