Things I didn't know about breastfeeding

I will admit I thought I had a good knowledge base about breastfeeding before I had you. But as always you have taught me that some things are only learnt through experience.

One of the things I most looked forward to when planning a baby was being able to nurse you, and if I'm honest I thought I was going to be awesome at it.

For years I have been telling women that the first six weeks are challenging and then it gets easier. Well turns out I'm a liar! It's more like the first three MONTHS are hard, exhausting, and at times painful. Frankly feeding a newborn sucks.

But as if you knew that these feeds were difficult for me, you would always hold my hand. No matter how uncomfortable or tired I was this little hand holding firmly onto mine was enough for me to get through those early days. 

Then we hit a lovely cruisy stage where it was fairly easy to feed you, enjoyable, the way I pictured nursing a baby. 

So apart from the constant soaking at night where many times I thought it might have started raining in our house only to realize I had a milk fountain showering us (not quite champagne showers but more nutritious!). 

Or I'd have to sniff the massive wet patch on the bed to see is that milk or has your nappy leaked? (Thankfully it was almost always milk). This was so far the easiest stage of our journey.

I knew that I would feed you on demand, and I expected you to feed to sleep as is biologically normal. But I didn't realize you would want to feed to sleep, then feed to wake, and really why not also let me sleep on here in between incase I need a snack while I'm asleep. But secretly mama loves this time as it's a little rest for me too while you sleep.

 

Then it seems you didn't just want milk and comfort anymore, but this also became a tactile experience. You bang your hand against my chest, squeeze squish and pinch the breast in an effort to speed up that let down or to make sure you managed to get every last drop of milk hiding in there. 

Sometimes you can't be bothered waiting for a let down so you will suck for two seconds, detach and check out surroundings, relatch for two seconds..nope not yet repeat till let down then drink. Unless someone talks or a bird squaks or a breeze blows then stop and sit up look around again. But if you dare put that breast away you are going to be in trouble cause can't you tell I'm feeding here?

When you are focused you often reach your hand up to explore the curves of my face, squeezing my nose and stroking my cheek. Stroking your hand across my chest feeling the change as the skin softens once the milk is almost gone. You seem so content.

I love these lessons you have taught me, even the painful ones like ensuring your nails are always trimmed or you will use them as a weapon. But we are still so early in our journey at only seven months, I know there are many more things I am yet to learn. 

I'm so grateful to be on this journey with you and I will cherish these moments long after the last drop of milk has dried up. 

Time warp

Time is such a strange thing, it can feel fast or slow, but it never really changes speed.

I feel as though since you were born time has sped up and you are leaping from one month to the next, if I blink I might miss it. 

Yet at the same time you are teaching me the art of slowing down and enjoying each moment. You teach me patience as I stop to let you cuddle and feed when we get to the shops to help settle and soothe you after an upsetting car ride. 

I let you walk holding my hands and watch your eyes light up as you slowly take each step, knowing the shops are closing soon and I am unlikely to get all my errands done. 

We take the time to sit with you on the lawn so you can feel the blades of grass between your fingers as your not yet ready to get back in the car. Even though we really must get home so daddy can sleep before night duty. 

Though whilst your Daddy and I are happy to give you this time, I can already feel the expectations of the world we live in creeping in. With comments like "what else are you doing besides being a mum?" "why does it take you so long to do everything?" "why are you always late?".

For me nothing is more important than giving you time because in a moment it's about to speed up and it will be gone. 

The funny things you do

I remember when you were first born and a friend came to visit with her baby boy who was about seven months old. I told her I was so sad as I wanted you to stay a tiny newborn forever because I loved it so much. She told me that she thought that too, but it just keeps getting better and better, and she was so right!

Your personality is so lovable, you know how to charm anyone with your cheeky grins. From the moment you wake up you are full of beans ready to explore. 

Blowing raspberries and spit bubbles is your new favourite thing to do, you love when people copy you. Experimenting with your voice is also fun, hearing the different sounds you can make. 

We love watching you do your "happy hands" as we call them. Where you grasp your hands together and rock them from side to side. 

And your new crowd pleasing trick is waving. Which came about after a curious situation. One night you did not want to go to sleep as you were very unsettled with teething pain. I was talking to you about Grandma who has passed. You were sitting up on my lap facing the chair which was Grandma's. 

Suddenly you stopped fussing and started smiling, then waving at the chair. You would look back to me and smile, then look back to the chair and wave. I have no explanation for this except to think that Grandma has taught you to wave! 

Oh yes and we are now up to three teeth all up the top! 

First family holiday- beach day!

M On the second day it was finally time to show you the beach. So after breakfast overlooking the water, we grabbed our gear and set off for a new adventure.

You loved walking along the sand and watching as the water splashed your legs. But it wasn't long until you felt abit overwhelmed so it was back to the shelter for some mama milk. 

While you fed daddy built you a sandcastle city. Then helped you stomp the sandcastles, jumping on them before plonking you down in the middle. I'm not sure if you or daddy enjoyed the sandcastles more.

Then we sat and watched as you explored the feeling of sand as it fell through your fingers and squished between your toes. Try as you might Daddy was not going to let you put a fist full of sand in your mouth.

Soon enough our tummies rumbled again and we set off for lunch and a nap. You slept so deeply and so long, it made me wonder if I should take you to the beach everyday.

In the afternoon we headed back to the beach, this time to catch a glimpse of the solar eclipse. We didn't see that but we did have lots of fun playing together and taking photos the cherish. Daddy later told me this was his favourite part of our holiday. 

First family holiday - sleepless nights

It seems your teeth decided that our first holiday away was the perfect time to finally break through your gums. So the nights were long and tiresome.

But the morning eventually arrived and so did your first tooth. To our surprise it was your front tooth on the right to make the first appearance. 

And to celebrate it's arrival a kangaroo visited us outside our balcony. You were so fascinated with the kangaroo, watching it as she grazed on the grass.

First family holiday- romantic dinners

A few new experiences for all of us as recently you have started baby led weaning. So this is our first holiday with a baby, who has started solids, AND we are now enjoying a paleo lifestyle so managing food on holidays can be tricky. 

We thought we were SO prepared. We organized preprepared meals, remembered the kombucha, took the portable high chair and researched where we could get paleo breakfasts on the coast.

But we forgot one thing...BIBS! So baby led weaning in public with no bibs, an added bit of fun! 

Our evenings were so romantic, a table set for three, water and buchi in wine glasses, naked baby in the middle while Frank Sinatra serenades us. 

Then we all jumped in the spa together. As you normally come in the shower with mama, this big pool of water was a brand new experience for you. You splashed and splashed and splashed despite your eyes turning red from the water. I think we will have to have baths more often!

Then there was a bit of dancing on the bed to get rid of that last bit of energy before we all snuggled under the covers and watched as you drifted off to sleep. 

Who knew holidays could be so much fun.

 

First family holiday- exploring

Our very first family holiday was so much fun I simply can't fit it in one post so I've decided to do a series of memories from it.

We decided twin waters was the perfect place for our first family holiday as Mama and Daddy have spent many holidays here together. 

Mama used to be so picky about what the room was like and making sure we had a good view and having everything planned out to make sure we got the most out of the stay. But now nothing else mattered except being with you and Daddy. 

On our first day we went for a walk to explore, you up on Daddy's back while we wondered hand in hand. The lake completely empty as the chilly wind blew across it. As the only guests around we were able to watch the fish feeding as a private viewing. You were very interested in the spashing and colours whizzing past.

Then we kept walking and chatting, soon enough you were asleep. Once we were about halfway around the lake the heavens opened and down came the rain. So we quickly ran under a big tree for shelter. Mama and Daddy couldn't help reminisce about how similar this situation was to our very first kiss. 

So there we stood listening to the rain fall around us, you asleep on Daddy's back as we shared a sneaky kiss under the shelter of the tree. 

Soon enough the rain stopped, and we continued on hand in hand just as we did all those years ago, but now with you along for the journey. 

Hair!

Hair is your current obsession. Be it reaching out to grab a chunk of the puppies hair (hence why they now always sit just out of your reach). 

You snuggle into my neck and wrap your arms around me and just as I'm enjoying this beautiful cuddle ...OUCH! You drag your fingers through my hair pulling it out of my messy bun. Then enjoy exploring the long strands of hair tangled between your fingers.

Up on daddies shoulders you run your hands over his short buzz cut grasping wildly to grab some. Daddy laughs and is thankful his hair is short (and keeps asking mama to trim it as soon as it gets long enough to grasp).

Sitting on Poppy's lap you still manage to find hair as you lean forward to reach for the hairs on his legs pulling them out and smiling. 

Even your own hair is exciting as you feed and relax you enjoy stroking your hand through your hair from back to front then front to back. Then you scrunch it up on the top where it is longer.

Who knew hair could be so interesting!